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Buckle up folks, this one is everywhere!
Ok, first off I'd like to link to a comic for the viewing pleasure of those coffee drinkers out there. It does contain a 'dirty phrase', so be forwarned (but still work safe). Consider it an homage, if you will, to all those people drinking frilly fu-fu coffee instead of the real deal. Coffee to me should be just that; coffee! No milk, no cream, no sugar... just bitter black liquid. Black as the night and as caffinated as a case of Bawls.

Ahhhh!! That's tasty!

Now, on to other things. I've heard from two friends recently who finally saw Hellboy, not in the theater as God intended, but at home on their TV. Both of which didn't seem too impressed, and one just seemed to think it was the worst idea since the invention of telemarketing. Now, I may be looking through Mignola-colored glasses here, but I absolutly loved it. Maybe it was the beaten up, tough lived look given to it by Guillermo Navarro, or the performance brought about by Perlman, or perhaps it was the source material, all of which I've read over and over, or simply all the little touches that Guillermo del Toro slaved over, but I thought it was a very fun movie, and an incredible easy 2 hours. I could have easily sat through another hour if they had fleshed out more character development. But I understand that for the sake of the casual movie goer, that this was best. Not everybody wants to see why "pamcakes" is such a great throw-away line. But they should...

That is what I love about DVDs. You may remember in one of my posts a while back, telling you about my shiney disc collection. Yeah, I've spent a load of money on DVDs, but it's because I love them so much. I get behind all the deleted scenes, commentaries, gag reels, music videos, DTS Surround Sound options, widescreen/fullscreen options, and extended editions. Toward the end of 2004, Hellboy will be released with a 3 DVD set, and you can bet your teacups that I'm going to buy it. Why? Because it's the version that Del Toro wanted me to see. The long version of the film. A version for the fans. And the fans like to double dip for good stuff. Good stuff.(A double dip of The Princess Diaries? Come on people! Where's my Monster Squad and/or Four Rooms:SE DVDs? Priorities!)

Right before Christmas last year, New Line Cinema thought enough of their fans to release the extended cuts of Fellowship of the Ring and The Two Towers in certain theaters across the country along with the release of Return of the King. As many of you know, I attended with some online buddies, as well as Pat and Adam, and it was fantastic. Granted, they showed each movie back to back so it was a test of will, not to mention your bladder, to sit though the entire thing, but it was a great time to be had. It was, dare I say... magical. We were gathered for three great films, one of which we had never seen, but were all there. For the sake of the films. Up until that point, I had never seen all of my FOTR:EE DVDs, and had never even popped in TTT:EE, so it was like I was watching them for the first time. I put away what I remember seeing and watched them again through fresh eyes.

That's another one of my graces. I don't get 'taken out' of movies easily. If I'm there in my little seat, holding onto an industrial size box of Junior Mints and the 8-gallon drum of Coke Classic, then I'm into the movie, I am completely enveloped in it. Aside from a few movies *cough**Van Hellsing**cough*, I don't easily get distracted by bad acting or plot holes big enough for Star Jones to hula-hoop with. Ok, that was a fat joke and I apologize. That was wrong. But I still stand by it because it's funny.

Anyway, since I've rambled on enough, I'll try and sum up here. DVDs are good. They are good because I care about that artistic vision of the director. And aside from George Lucas, I want to see what the director wants me to see, not what the studio thinks I want to see. I want the commentaries, I want the animated menues, I want the option to listen to the movie in either Cantonese or Mandarine Chinese. And I especially want the little montages like on the Snatch 2-disc DVD. Brilliant! DVDs allow me to see every little thing I could care to about the film. And I love that.

This is also an open letter to all manner of commericalism. If the IBC Cream Soda or Shonen Jump companies want me to whore myself out to them, I'll do that as well. I love your products and I'm not ashamed to say so. I'm only ashamed of this Sailor Moon outfit I'm wearing right now. It's a little tight in the shoulders, but fits pretty good around the waist.

What? It was the only thing clean...