Kids these days

I'm going to take you back, back all the way to 1986. It was Christmas break, I was over at my aunt Connie's house, my cousin Kim had rented the soon-to-be classic film "Better Off Dead". 90 minutes later I had fallen in love with Camero's, snow skiing and Diane Franklin. I wanted to be Lane Meyer. I thought that would have been the coolest thing when I was 12.

Later that same Christmas holiday, with my cousin Stephen staying at our house for a few days, I got to know the joys of Van Halen. My little stereo got heavy play of Jamie's Cryin', Everybody Wants Some! (from 'Better Off Dead!"), Push Come To Shove, and just about everything on 1984. I also got some Poison and Ratt, but Van Halen was the big one that Christmas. Anyway, I got to listen to Eddie wail on that guitar and would sit in my room, thinking about one day playing the ax just like that.

And then it comes down to tonight...

Tonight I'm coming home from work and listening to 'Love Line' as usual, and tonight's guest was wunderkid Andy Milinokis. I'll admit to knowing just about absolutely nada about this man-child so I made it a point to check out why he was getting his 15 minutes in the limelight. As I was pulling into my spot here at Casa de Craphole, one of the callers claimed to 'love Andy so much!" He said he was always doing his bits to his friends at school, everyone thought he was great. And then it came out. "I idolize you, man!"

Dear Lord in Heaven.

When did America start producing crap idols? I had a Camero-driving, French girl-dating hero and a guitar god to look up to, but kids these days have some chubby geek that sang some stupid song on his webcam. I usually spout the acclaims of the internet, but not this time. This is just...silly. Ok, granted... looking up to John Cusack and Eddie Van Halen when I was 12 wasn't exactly the coolest thing I've done, I know I could have done worse, but the callers on 'Love Line' tonight were 17 and 19 years old. That seems a little old to wanting to emulate someone like Andy Milinokis.

Anyway, I know real heros when I see them now. People like this...






















...not so much.

So, I don't know... just wanted to rant a bit about a sad trend here in the world today. I remember watching The Breakfast Club, wanting to be Bender, or listening to Billy Joel and thinking that if I could play piano well I could get a girl like Christy Brinkly (hey, I could dream), but come on. Singing a goofy song about peas and bees does not a worthy childhood hero make.

Sheep.